LIES I HAVE TOLD: MERCENARY MOPPET

by Keef Rutledge on April 12, 2012

When I was four, tired of pre-school and the endless drudgery of fingerpainting and lollygagging on the monkey-bars, I decided to embark on a new venture that would allow me a change of scenery. I opened my latest issue of Soldier of Fortune, turned to the classified ads in the back, and looked for a suitable position. Within a month I was riding my Jeep through the mountainous terrain of Sierra Leone, my high, girlish prepubescent voice shrieking with rage and fury, unloading round after round of hot flying lead at the opposition. After a few years of that, finger-painting looks pretty goddamned interesting after all.

(Keef Rutledge lives in Austin and can be seen at www.keef.org.)

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